Why do Men Feel its okay to not be 100% open dating TS

[TsBrooklynMattel]

(NOT A MAN HATER, YET)Jk ;)
I wanna know why a majority of men who are into trans-women have such a hard time being open. Being in public, bringing her around friends or family. Taking her serious as far as relationships. I see alot of men saying

"LOOKING FOR MY TS-WIFEY"

WTF u cant possibly be looking for a Trans-wifey if you dont take her seriously.

Somebody please explain to me why? i just wanna know?

[CosmicTraveler]

Because acceptance for a guy dating a TS girl isn't always so assured. At times it can be strenuous. Not everyone can handle it. It's not a problem for me personally, but I can understand why some people have the mentality. However if that is the case, they shouldn't be trying to get serious with a TS. There's no sense in pursuing a relationship with someone if you feel like you can't be seen with them. A person shouldn't have to live in shame because of your hang ups. But I'm getting off topic.

[raheme]

I will date a ts publicly but I won't date a hoe publicly...its a big difference. Her being a ts has nothing to do with me wanting to creep. How many women want to be all out in the public with a kknown man whore?

[TsBrooklynMattel]

I will date a ts publicly but I won't date a hoe publicly...its a big difference. Her being a ts has nothing to do with me wanting to creep. How many women want to be all out in the public with a kknown man whore?

okay, but i wasnt talking about promiscuous women. As far as someone like me who alot of people dont even know that i am a ts and i live right next to them and they see and speak to me online or in person. Dating. If you date a sweet girl who didnt live a gay lifestyle before becoming a transsexual. why is it hard for guys to date her. & as far as hoes. alot of guys encourage things they cant control. Like during sex. dirty talk isnt just dirty talk bc alot of men really be into calling his girlfriend a dirty slut. and suck my dick bitch. all that is making ur sweet reserved non-freak girlfriend into something u want & more. ( just saying)

[raheme]

okay, but i wasnt talking about promiscuous women. As far as someone like me who alot of people dont even know that i am a ts and i live right next to them and they see and speak to me online or in person. Dating. If you date a sweet girl who didnt live a gay lifestyle before becoming a transsexual. why is it hard for guys to date her. & as far as hoes. alot of guys encourage things they cant control. Like during sex. dirty talk isnt just dirty talk bc alot of men really be into calling his girlfriend a dirty slut. and suck my dick bitch. all that is making ur sweet reserved non-freak girlfriend into something u want & more. ( just saying)

I don't do hypotheticals ma, I do actuals. I don't know u or ya situation or the level of dudes u choose to interact with. But my ears perk up whenever I here someone try to prove causation unscientifically. A+b does not always = c.
Maybe those dudes are assholes
Maybe they are young
Maybe you are putting out the wrong vibe and attracting the wrong kinda dudes

Possibilities are endless. However I do know that your chances of finding a quality dude would increase exponentially if you put yourself in a position to meet the kind of guy you want.
If I'm looking for angels, the last place I'm checking for them is hell...jus sayin

[TsBrooklynMattel]

I don't do hypotheticals ma, I do actuals. I don't know u or ya situation or the level of dudes u choose to interact with. But my ears perk up whenever I here someone try to prove causation unscientifically. A+b does not always = c.
Maybe those dudes are assholes
Maybe they are young
Maybe you are putting out the wrong vibe and attracting the wrong kinda dudes

Possibilities are endless. However I do know that your chances of finding a quality dude would increase exponentially if you put yourself in a position to meet the kind of guy you want.
If I'm looking for angels, the last place I'm checking for them is hell...jus sayin

when did this become an attack on me? the post was general not why guys are duchebags to Brooklyn Mattel. I know guys are dicks & i know guys are sweethearts. I know that. and if u dont do hypothetical u dont have to answer. i was just asking for those who do and dont personalize every post of themself and others. ( just saying. most definitively not a lashback, only clearly the error)

[raheme]

when did this become an attack on me? the post was general not why guys are duchebags to Brooklyn Mattel. I know guys are dicks & i know guys are sweethearts. I know that. and if u dont do hypothetical u dont have to answer. i was just asking for those who do and dont personalize every post of themself and others. ( just saying. most definitively not a lashback, only clearly the error)

Not an attack.

We either speaking directly or via generalizations, can't have it both ways.

My reply is more matter of fact than matter of maybe.

Stick your hand in fire you will get burned. Socialize with losers, might date a loser.

[TsBrooklynMattel]

Not an attack.

We either speaking directly or via generalizations, can't have it both ways.

My reply is more matter of fact than matter of maybe.

Stick your hand in fire you will get burned. Socialize with losers, might date a loser.


So true. Doesnt mean that you are always playing with fire when u got burned. Somebody else could have set it.
lol

im done with this now

[thegirlnextdoor]

ive been in three committed relationships ever.all of them as a woman.the first guy i dated was kinda in the closet but towards the end of our relationship became more comfortable with being seen with me.we were together for two years.i was very young than and thought that this was the only kind of relationship girls like me could have.
my second boyfriend never had a problem being seen with me, however when it came to meeting his family and friends it was a different story.we broke up alittle more than a year ago.at this point i was mature enough and had a strong enough sense of self that it caused me great deal of pain.its very hard to be in love with someone and that person says they love you too yet are ashamed to bring you around their people.i finally walked away after an incident on the street where he ignored me because his boy was around.i was messed up for a long time and still bear some emotional scars from that relationship.
the guy im with now though is 120% open with me.i have meet his mother,dad,and two sisters.it wasnt a big deal for him at all.infact i was the one having panic attacks and shit lol.his family was very friendly towards me and there was never an akward moment or question of gender.i was just the girl their son brought home.while they never brought up any suspicions about my gender we have talked about letting them know or not.he basically left it up me to decide.he made it clear tho that either way he supports me.if they know they know,if they dont they dont :)

[CosmicTraveler]

ive been in three committed relationships ever.all of them as a woman.the first guy i dated was kinda in the closet but towards the end of our relationship became more comfortable with being seen with me.we were together for two years.i was very young than and thought that this was the only kind of relationship girls like me could have.
my second boyfriend never had a problem being seen with me, however when it came to meeting his family and friends it was a different story.we broke up alittle more than a year ago.at this point i was mature enough and had a strong enough sense of self that it caused me great deal of pain.its very hard to be in love with someone and that person says they love you too yet are ashamed to bring you around their people.i finally walked away after an incident on the street where he ignored me because his boy was around.i was messed up for a long time and still bear some emotional scars from that relationship.
the guy im with now though is 120% open with me.i have meet his mother,dad,and two sisters.it wasnt a big deal for him at all.infact i was the one having panic attacks and shit lol.his family was very friendly towards me and there was never an akward moment or question of gender.i was just the girl their son brought home.while they never brought up any suspicions about my gender we have talked about letting them know or not.he basically left it up me to decide.he made it clear tho that either way he supports me.if they know they know,if they dont they dont :)

He... he sounds like a good guy... ; ___;

[TsBrooklynMattel]

ive been in three committed relationships ever.all of them as a woman.the first guy i dated was kinda in the closet but towards the end of our relationship became more comfortable with being seen with me.we were together for two years.i was very young than and thought that this was the only kind of relationship girls like me could have.
My second boyfriend never had a problem being seen with me, however when it came to meeting his family and friends it was a different story.we broke up alittle more than a year ago.at this point i was mature enough and had a strong enough sense of self that it caused me great deal of pain.its very hard to be in love with someone and that person says they love you too yet are ashamed to bring you around their people.i finally walked away after an incident on the street where he ignored me because his boy was around.i was messed up for a long time and still bear some emotional scars from that relationship.
The guy im with now though is 120% open with me.i have meet his mother,dad,and two sisters.it wasnt a big deal for him at all.infact i was the one having panic attacks and shit lol.his family was very friendly towards me and there was never an akward moment or question of gender.i was just the girl their son brought home.while they never brought up any suspicions about my gender we have talked about letting them know or not.he basically left it up me to decide.he made it clear tho that either way he supports me.if they know they know,if they dont they dont :)

reason i love u #2

[Indy24]

(NOT A MAN HATER, YET)Jk ;)
I wanna know why a majority of men who are into trans-women have such a hard time being open. Being in public, bringing her around friends or family. Taking her serious as far as relationships. I see alot of men saying

"LOOKING FOR MY TS-WIFEY"

WTF u cant possibly be looking for a Trans-wifey if you dont take her seriously.

Somebody please explain to me why? i just wanna know?

It's strictly need to know basis....No shame here, a bad lookin chick on my arm is just that. Hell most tgirls don't even tell us until they're good and ready anyway, so there's that to.

[werwt22]

Okay im gone give you the realest answer ever. Were not okay with going out in public with most GGs either if were well known, so why when you assume that lifestyle would you think your any different?. This is shit women deal with 24/7 and you just got added to the pot for whatever reason. Me being seen with you hurts my chances of getting with her. "Diary of a Pimp named Slickback" coming soon LOL J/K. Sad part is this statement is so true. Im not saying the TS part isnt a huge factor, but even w/o it you stand a huge chance of getting played just for the ass that i could possibly get in the future. Somebody gotta know what im sayin

[TsBrooklynMattel]

Okay im gone give you the realest answer ever. Were not okay with going out in public with most GGs either if were well known, so why when you assume that lifestyle would you think your any different?. This is shit women deal with 24/7 and you just got added to the pot for whatever reason. Me being seen with you hurts my chances of getting with her. "Diary of a Pimp named Slickback" coming soon LOL J/K. Sad part is this statement is so true. Im not saying the TS part isnt a huge factor, but even w/o it you stand a huge chance of getting played just for the ass that i could possibly get in the future. Somebody gotta know what im sayin

U proved an overall point to why ts & women turn to escorting. its smarter to play then game then get played. This seems like 2 Can Play that Game. its sad but thats how things really are. & as far as the lifestyle, If u(general use of u) choose to talk to ts women, honestly she has no obligation not to shout it in the world that u mess with her. So games call for more games?

[MrF]

Unfortunately, there is a social stigma associated with transexuality which makes it, to many people, either morally wrong or mentally aberrant. It seems to me this attitude will gradually die away as issues like gay marriage and tolerance towards GLBT become the norm. When the younger generations replace the older ones. Unfortunately, you might be middle-aged by the time this sea change in attitude occurs.

Actually, it's a fascinating question (to me) that I've asked myself for years: why is transexuality "normal" and "ok" ? Or for that matter homosexuality ? I could launch into one of my "scientific" explanations but I don't feel like it right now and besides I doubt anyone wants to read it. Suffice it to say I've concluded that it is perfectly normal, but my thinking is always out of synch with most people. You just have to find someone who thinks differently and is strong-minded enough to not care what others think once they've made up their mind. But not pig-headed, of course; based on strong reasoning. BTW, I'm not saying I'm morally perfect but after learning what I have, I would be capable of an open relationship with a TG.

[TsBrooklynMattel]

Unfortunately, there is a social stigma associated with transexuality which makes it, to many people, either morally wrong or mentally aberrant. It seems to me this attitude will gradually die away as issues like gay marriage and tolerance towards GLBT become the norm. When the younger generations replace the older ones. Unfortunately, you might be middle-aged by the time this sea change in attitude occurs.

Actually, it's a fascinating question (to me) that I've asked myself for years: why is transexuality "normal" and "ok" ? Or for that matter homosexuality ? I could launch into one of my "scientific" explanations but I don't feel like it right now and besides I doubt anyone wants to read it. Suffice it to say I've concluded that it is perfectly normal, but my thinking is always out of synch with most people. You just have to find someone who thinks differently and is strong-minded enough to not care what others think once they've made up their mind. But not pig-headed, of course; based on strong reasoning. BTW, I'm not saying I'm morally perfect but after learning what I have, I would be capable of an open relationship with a TG.
thank u so much for having a open mind and open to understanding things rather then just going with things and not thinking about ur actions. ugh that make my heart smile

[DYNACORD]

(NOT A MAN HATER, YET)Jk ;)
I wanna know why a majority of men who are into trans-women have such a hard time being open. Being in public, bringing her around friends or family. Taking her serious as far as relationships. I see alot of men saying

"LOOKING FOR MY TS-WIFEY"

WTF u cant possibly be looking for a Trans-wifey if you dont take her seriously.

Somebody please explain to me why? i just wanna know?

Because they are not truly 100% into the girls. They think they are. They aren't the right fellows for you or Amber. You have to love the whole package of a TS girl. Even the controversy.

But::it does seem to be dependent on the passability of the girl as far as meeting the family and friends. Men prefer a pretty girl to take home to MOM. All men like to be seen with pretty women. It's the damn truth. Doesn't matter if it's a TS or a GG. There is a model coming on here soon whom I introduced to my friends and my son's this past year. Never a doubt. And there shouldn't be one for multiple reasons.

[dieselb]

It's hard because, not everybody is accepting of it. I hear a lot of people say if they were really your friends then they would accept it. It's not always true, is it worth the risk to loose your family, and your friends over it. When you don't know if the relationship will actually last. It's a huge risk, because your friends will think you are gay, should the relationship not work out, will be hard to date gg. It's just a huge gamble. Homosexuality is not accepted by everyone, even though, it's a transexual woman, it's still viewed as homosexuality. That's why a lot of guys, who like it, will do it on the d.l. to avoid the consequences of family and friends finding out.

[MrF]

I think the last 2 posts by dieselb and dynacord really captured it. Men are under a lot of social pressure. That doesn't mean it's right to mistreat a TG, though. Morally, it would be better to leave her alone and find a GG. But at a minimum it would be best to be honest about your feelings, admitting your fears and thoughts about being open.

Now, if the TG is pretty and passable (which go together in my opinion), it makes it much easier to be seen on a date in public or introduce her to family and friends as an acquiaintance. And if the relationship becomes deeper, the guy should be willing to be open about her status, assuming that's what she wants. BTW, a lot of gay couples find it difficult to come out (I'm talking about man/man or woman/woman), experiencing a similar social pressure to man/TG.

[TurboMan]

Great point Guys..you really hit home.

[Ms Remy M]

I will date a ts publicly but I won't date a hoe publicly...its a big difference. Her being a ts has nothing to do with me wanting to creep. How many women want to be all out in the public with a kknown man whore?

I asked one of my high school buddies this question, and this seems a good time to pose it as well. Would you openly date a successful porn star? I don't mean the sort that escort on the side.

[Ms Remy M]

ive been in three committed relationships ever.all of them as a woman.the first guy i dated was kinda in the closet but towards the end of our relationship became more comfortable with being seen with me.we were together for two years.i was very young than and thought that this was the only kind of relationship girls like me could have.
my second boyfriend never had a problem being seen with me, however when it came to meeting his family and friends it was a different story.we broke up alittle more than a year ago.at this point i was mature enough and had a strong enough sense of self that it caused me great deal of pain.its very hard to be in love with someone and that person says they love you too yet are ashamed to bring you around their people.i finally walked away after an incident on the street where he ignored me because his boy was around.i was messed up for a long time and still bear some emotional scars from that relationship.
the guy im with now though is 120% open with me.i have meet his mother,dad,and two sisters.it wasnt a big deal for him at all.infact i was the one having panic attacks and shit lol.his family was very friendly towards me and there was never an akward moment or question of gender.i was just the girl their son brought home.while they never brought up any suspicions about my gender we have talked about letting them know or not.he basically left it up me to decide.he made it clear tho that either way he supports me.if they know they know,if they dont they dont :)

*hugs* Sorry to hear about the bs you went through with those boys. This last guy is how a real man out the lot!

[thegreat1]

I asked one of my high school buddies this question, and this seems a good time to pose it as well. Would you openly date a successful porn star? I don't mean the sort that escort on the side.

I have and would...what she does is what she does...I do have some reservations though

[Ms Remy M]

It's hard because, not everybody is accepting of it. I hear a lot of people say if they were really your friends then they would accept it. It's not always true, is it worth the risk to loose your family, and your friends over it. When you don't know if the relationship will actually last. It's a huge risk, because your friends will think you are gay, should the relationship not work out, will be hard to date gg. It's just a huge gamble. Homosexuality is not accepted by everyone, even though, it's a transexual woman, it's still viewed as homosexuality. That's why a lot of guys, who like it, will do it on the d.l. to avoid the consequences of family and friends finding out.

You know, at one point, Blacks couldn't date whites, people use to die over it. It's hardly that serious with dating trans women, where you 'may' have to deal with familial rejection. People always assume, family and friends are going to freak out, but at the end of the day most will realize It's No Big Deal. If your friend stop liking you because you are happy with a trans woman than they were not your friends to begin with, you can always make more.

There's no gamble, women are not going to stop liking you all of a sudden, that sounds silly. Damn hilarious hearing guys act like the genetic girls don't like trans women themselves, perhaps they are just putting on the same front you are, and both the fools sitting there wishing they had the best of both worlds by their side.

[Ms Remy M]

I think the last 2 posts by dieselb and dynacord really captured it. Men are under a lot of social pressure. That doesn't mean it's right to mistreat a TG, though. Morally, it would be better to leave her alone and find a GG. But at a minimum it would be best to be honest about your feelings, admitting your fears and thoughts about being open.

Now, if the TG is pretty and passable (which go together in my opinion), it makes it much easier to be seen on a date in public or introduce her to family and friends as an acquiaintance. And if the relationship becomes deeper, the guy should be willing to be open about her status, assuming that's what she wants. BTW, a lot of gay couples find it difficult to come out (I'm talking about man/man or woman/woman), experiencing a similar social pressure to man/TG.

It's more of a perceived social pressure, because as everyone who has come out can tell you, there's a huge weight coming off those shoulders when a person comes out, and it's like "wow, what the hell was I waiting for" You only have one life to live, don't spend it appeasing family and friends lol that would really be a waste of a life.

Seriously, I just watched a documentary last month "Worst Place To Be Gay" it was an African Nation. The death penalty is leveled quickly toward gays there, and guess what, people still come out openly and they have real problems and ignorance amongst the people to contend with.

[raheme]

I asked one of my high school buddies this question, and this seems a good time to pose it as well. Would you openly date a successful porn star? I don't mean the sort that escort on the side.

Yes. That's totally different.

[CosmicTraveler]

You know, at one point, Blacks couldn't date whites, people use to die over it. It's hardly that serious with dating trans women, where you 'may' have to deal with familial rejection. People always assume, family and friends are going to freak out, but at the end of the day most will realize It's No Big Deal. If your friend stop liking you because you are happy with a trans woman than they were not your friends to begin with, you can always make more.

There's no gamble, women are not going to stop liking you all of a sudden, that sounds silly. Damn hilarious hearing guys act like the genetic girls don't like trans women themselves, perhaps they are just putting on the same front you are, and both the fools sitting there wishing they had the best of both worlds by their side.

Sometimes that can be a problem though. It's not as if all women will be put off, but if you get involved with someone, it comes up and she's not so accepting, it can be a real downer. I had a girl freak out because I'd been with a couple of trans girls before. She thought I " was going to leave her for some guy. " Which annoyed me on several levels. ( Mainly that she had no faith in me. ) So it's not a totally void issue, it's just one that can be very much avoided early in the relationship as opposed to later on.

[CosmicTraveler]

It's more of a perceived social pressure, because as everyone who has come out can tell you, there's a huge weight coming off those shoulders when a person comes out, and it's like "wow, what the hell was I waiting for" You only have one life to live, don't spend it appeasing family and friends lol that would really be a waste of a life.

Seriously, I just watched a documentary last month "Worst Place To Be Gay" it was an African Nation. The death penalty is leveled quickly toward gays there, and guess what, people still come out openly and they have real problems and ignorance amongst the people to contend with.

I saw a video with some African preacher going on and on about what gays do in the privacy of their own home ( his words ) and how wrong it was. He went on to describe a number of sexual acts that in all honesty I doubt were common amongst people of any sexual orientation. This is one of the major reasons I'm against anyone who mumbles about going back to the " Motherland. " It's hot and there are lions. No.

[Ms Remy M]

Yes. That's totally different.

Interesting. Porn stars are being paid for sex ON camera, escort are being paid for their time (may include sex) OFF camera.

What makes you say yes to the porn star and no to the escort?

[Ms Remy M]

Sometimes that can be a problem though. It's not as if all women will be put off, but if you get involved with someone, it comes up and she's not so accepting, it can be a real downer. I had a girl freak out because I'd been with a couple of trans girls before. She thought I " was going to leave her for some guy. " Which annoyed me on several levels. ( Mainly that she had no faith in me. ) So it's not a totally void issue, it's just one that can be very much avoided early in the relationship as opposed to later on.

Ok I will agree with you, because I do know that not all women are into trans, or accepting of their men who are into trans. However; there are so many women that are, if you feel you want to date a GG why not choose one that is open minded as you are.

[CosmicTraveler]

Ok I will agree with you, because I do know that not all women are into trans, or accepting of their men who are into trans. However; there are so many women that are, if you feel you want to date a GG why not choose one that is open minded as you are.

That's my basic view of it. But there are times when you can get wrapped up in a person without realizing there are aspects of them that you may not agree with and vice versa. You can try looking only for certain types but then you end up limiting the circle you keep and drawing boundaries between you and certain people which in a way is sort of the opposite of what we as humans should be aiming for... Okay I'm gettin' preachy, I'll stop here.

[Ms Remy M]

That's my basic view of it. But there are times when you can get wrapped up in a person without realizing there are aspects of them that you may not agree with and vice versa. You can try looking only for certain types but then you end up limiting the circle you keep and drawing boundaries between you and certain people which in a way is sort of the opposite of what we as humans should be aiming for... Okay I'm gettin' preachy, I'll stop here.

Ha, a quagmire was forming lol I see what you are trying to say though. I have found myself to be attracted to people with flaws/faults and that I like them on account of their flaws, which sadly has led to some really bad relationships where I get treated like shit. I think it's because I spend so much time trying to care about people and being PC, having a lover that is more "wild child" to be a bit appealing, yin/yang and all. Regardless, I don't spend time with out right bigots, and even gays can be bigots which is sad for any minority to be bigots (history not learned at all). I surround myself with open minded people, I have learned from business that you do have to draw lines between yourself and certain people, because some people are like crabs in a barrel and will gladly drag you down with them.

[CosmicTraveler]

Ha, a quagmire was forming lol I see what you are trying to say though. I have found myself to be attracted to people with flaws/faults and that I like them on account of their flaws, which sadly has led to some really bad relationships where I get treated like shit. I think it's because I spend so much time trying to care about people and being PC, having a lover that is more "wild child" to be a bit appealing, yin/yang and all. Regardless, I don't spend time with out right bigots, and even gays can be bigots which is sad for any minority to be bigots (history not learned at all). I surround myself with open minded people, I have learned from business that you do have to draw lines between yourself and certain people, because some people are like crabs in a barrel and will gladly drag you down with them.

Giggity goo.

Yeah I have to agree with that. There are many people who seem to live for the sake of dragging others down with them. I also find it ass backwards for a person to be a bigot when they're in the minority of anything. I mean really it's ass backwards for any reason.

So you like the wild ones do you? .... * screeches and flings poop * This plan can't fail...

[Ms Remy M]

Giggity goo.

Yeah I have to agree with that. There are many people who seem to live for the sake of dragging others down with them. I also find it ass backwards for a person to be a bigot when they're in the minority of anything. I mean really it's ass backwards for any reason.

So you like the wild ones do you? .... * screeches and flings poop * This plan can't fail...

You are too fucking funny Cosmic! :) It's even funnier cause I'm such an "icky don't touch it" kind of person, I have issues using public restrooms, shaking hands, shopping in walmart etc. Then, here you are flinging poo. :p

[CosmicTraveler]

You are too fucking funny Cosmic! :) It's even funnier cause I'm such an "icky don't touch it" kind of person, I have issues using public restrooms, shaking hands, shopping in walmart etc. Then, here you are flinging poo. :p

Damn! It back fired! Time for plan B... - pulls out a Kraven the Hunter fur and attaches it to his regular hoodie -

I had a problem with stuff like that myself. The bathroom thing I had to get over because I was working 8 hours a day and the trip home was yet another hour. Not to mention the bathroom became my sanction away from work. I'd go in there and just listen to music sometimes...

I still won't shake hands with most people though. I'm known in my circles as the guy who gives pounds instead of slapping fives. As for shopping... I hate going out in the day in general so I avoid that as much as possible.

[TsBrooklynMattel]

Wow, now i thought people were going to sit in here and come up with some bogus double standard stereotypical BS, but im glad that people pointed out both sides.


I asked the question not for myself personally. But Because it happens to a Vast Majority of T-Girls. I dont think its fair at all to not share your concerns with her before you engage in dating or a relationship. It not fair at all for her to be in a relationship expecting your word to mean anything to her when your lying to her aswell as yourself and others. Its not fair for him to promote her confidence & him hide in the shadows.

I think if he wants to date a ts he should tell her i wanna date you but im not sure if i can be out with you in public yet. Or introduce you to my friends & family yet, atleast until i know we are serious. But alot of times people dont do that because SEX comes before Conversations now a days.

Just sharing my view of why its wrong (IN MY HEAD) and Why it doesnt work.

[CosmicTraveler]

Do you mean down low relationships or having sex before getting to know someone? As far as that last comment I mean.

[Ms Remy M]

Damn! It back fired! Time for plan B... - pulls out a Kraven the Hunter fur and attaches it to his regular hoodie -

I had a problem with stuff like that myself. The bathroom thing I had to get over because I was working 8 hours a day and the trip home was yet another hour. Not to mention the bathroom became my sanction away from work. I'd go in there and just listen to music sometimes...

I still won't shake hands with most people though. I'm known in my circles as the guy who gives pounds instead of slapping fives. As for shopping... I hate going out in the day in general so I avoid that as much as possible.

Enough, we are derailing the thread. lol

Men are men, they are throwing game with the line that you mentioned in the OP about looking for TS wifey. I say, stay away from any online relationships. Meeting a person face to face will nullify a lot of the bs, and I don't mean, meet online and then meet in person. Stick to the men that actually walk up to you and pursue you, be up front and honest from the jump off and let things go where they may.

[CosmicTraveler]

Enough, we are derailing the thread. lol

Men are men, they are throwing game with the line that you mentioned in the OP about looking for TS wifey. I say, stay away from any online relationships. Meeting a person face to face will nullify a lot of the bs, and I don't mean, meet online and then meet in person. Stick to the men that actually walk up to you and pursue you, be up front and honest from the jump off and let things go where they may.

Yeah I felt that way too. >_>

You're cuttin' up half my game right there....... some of us really suck at that sort of thing.

And there are also times where a guy might be afraid to approach a TS simply because he isn't sure. And figures that if he does mention it, and she isn't, then there's bound to be some sort of issue.

[TsBrooklynMattel]

Yeah I felt that way too. >_>

You're cuttin' up half my game right there....... some of us really suck at that sort of thing.

And there are also times where a guy might be afraid to approach a TS simply because he isn't sure. And figures that if he does mention it, and she isn't, then there's bound to be some sort of issue.

You should approach someone by whether they have a dick or not. it should be i find u attractive. Later down the line you may end up with a gg woman who makes u happier then u thought u would have been with a tg woman.

[thegirlnextdoor]

i feel this way,if you know that you arent ready to truly be with a ts girl than dont waste her time and mess with her feelings.if your that caught up on the "social pressures" than just find a ts escort and pay her for your time.
this whole social pressure thing is bullshit anyway.my boyfriend and i havent really encountered any hostility or static.like i said not a single family member or friend asked him if i was a man or none of that nonsense.i dont think its because im that pretty or passable.i believe its because he's so confident in who he is and about being with me that it doesnt come off in any other way other than natural.
i wish me being trans was a deterrent for women.i dont know if it cause they might know im trans or cause hes a 6'2 latin pretty boy but these hoes be falling all over themselves around this nigga lol.

[CosmicTraveler]

You should approach someone by whether they have a dick or not. it should be i find u attractive. Later down the line you may end up with a gg woman who makes u happier then u thought u would have been with a tg woman.

I prefer not to approach people in general. >_>

Besides both tgs and ggs have been pretty much even as far as my experiences go. At this point I have to see them all as women because they've all had the same varying degrees of personality traits that I hate and love. However I do think it would be a weird experience to pull down a girl's pants expecting a dick and not getting one. I imagine there'd be no way to hide the reaction upon one's face and of course from there, there's questions. You can lie, or you can be honest, and that would likely determine the kind of relationship that you had with that person from now on... I think too much.

[CosmicTraveler]

i feel this way,if you know that you arent ready to truly be with a ts girl than dont waste her time and mess with her feelings.if your that caught up on the "social pressures" than just find a ts escort and pay her for your time.
this whole social pressure thing is bullshit anyway.my boyfriend and i havent really encountered any hostility or static.like i said not a single family member or friend asked him if i was a man or none of that nonsense.i dont think its because im that pretty or passable.i believe its because he's so confident in who he is and about being with me that it doesnt come off in any other way other than natural.
i wish me being trans was a deterrent for women.i dont know if it cause they might know im trans or cause hes a 6'2 latin pretty boy but these hoes be falling all over themselves around this nigga lol.

That's another thing I was working my way to. If you feel like you can't date a TS like any other person, you shouldn't. Go pay one who doesn't give a damn about whether or not you show her off to your family. It's much easier for you and you get that... shamed feeling that you seem to like so much after you're done.

Also... stop your bragging woman... - __- ( some of us are... really jealous... )

[raheme]

i feel this way,if you know that you arent ready to truly be with a ts girl than dont waste her time and mess with her feelings.if your that caught up on the "social pressures" than just find a ts escort and pay her for your time.
this whole social pressure thing is bullshit anyway.my boyfriend and i havent really encountered any hostility or static.like i said not a single family member or friend asked him if i was a man or none of that nonsense.i dont think its because im that pretty or passable.i believe its because he's so confident in who he is and about being with me that it doesnt come off in any other way other than natural.
i wish me being trans was a deterrent for women.i dont know if it cause they might know im trans or cause hes a 6'2 latin pretty boy but these hoes be falling all over themselves around this nigga lol.

So what's applicable for your boyfriend should be standard for all dudes? Ummm, ok, I see.

Just because I can paint don't make me picaso.

I played ball in college but mj I am not.

What works for 1 doesn't always work for another.

I really dislike when people do hypocritical shit.

Ms. Amber, were u a ts in dc? Didn't u say u moved to ny to transition and be away from the judgements of folks u grew up with? Isn't that social pressure? So on one hand this social pressure 'bullshit' was strong enough for u to do things the way u did but not strong enough for a potential mate to have doubts about 'coming out' to his fam and friends...

Nah that's not a double standard at all

[thegirlnextdoor]

So what's applicable for your boyfriend should be standard for all dudes? Ummm, ok, I see.

Just because I can paint don't make me picaso.

I played ball in college but mj I am not.

What works for 1 doesn't always work for another.

I really dislike when people do hypocritical shit.

Ms. Amber, were u a ts in dc? Didn't u say u moved to ny to transition and be away from the judgements of folks u grew up with? Isn't that social pressure? So on one hand this social pressure 'bullshit' was strong enough for u to do things the way u did but not strong enough for a potential mate to have doubts about 'coming out' to his fam and friends...
Nah that's not a double standard at all

um no thats not what i said.dont think you have me figured out because we exchanged a few text messages lol.
i left dc not because i wanted to transition but because i had alot of negative stuff going on in my life that werent transition related.i have been extremely fem my whole life and expressed it thru the way i dressed,mannerisms,and etc. so my sexuality and gender expression was less of an issue with my family/friends.i never really went thru any of that bullying,ostracize crap that some people go thru.i have a relationship with my family and as you know i was down there a few weeks ago visiting them.
my ending up in new york was purely accidental after doing some volunteer work in chiang mai,thiland.
and yes what is applicable for my boyfriend will be the standard for all dudes i date after him (if theres an after him lol).if any one doesnt like that they dont have to date me,im not strong arming niggas here lmao.
i always find it interesting when guys get mad or offended because of how i choose to live my life.you dont see me getting angry at you becuase you dont want to date an escort (yet you tried to holla at me) or because you have reservations about openly dating a ts.im not going to be mad at you,your just not going to have any place in my life (other than say as a client,and thats not my life lol).

[CosmicTraveler]

.if any one doesnt like that they dont have to date me,im not strong arming niggas here lmao.


You say things that generally amuse me.:p

[BigJoeKrash]

I never had an issue with it. I have always treated my lady with respect. Never had a problem going out for meals, movies, or just to see the family.

[raheme]

um no thats not what i said.dont think you have me figured out because we exchanged a few text messages lol.
i left dc not because i wanted to transition but because i had alot of negative stuff going on in my life that werent transition related.i have been extremely fem my whole life and expressed it thru the way i dressed,mannerisms,and etc. so my sexuality and gender expression was less of an issue with my family/friends.i never really went thru any of that bullying,ostracize crap that some people go thru.i have a relationship with my family and as you know i was down there a few weeks ago visiting them.
my ending up in new york was purely accidental after doing some volunteer work in chiang mai,thiland.
and yes what is applicable for my boyfriend will be the standard for all dudes i date after him (if theres an after him lol).if any one doesnt like that they dont have to date me,im not strong arming niggas here lmao.
i always find it interesting when guys get mad or offended because of how i choose to live my life.you dont see me getting angry at you becuase you dont want to date an escort (yet you tried to holla at me) or because you have reservations about openly dating a ts.im not going to be mad at you,your just not going to have any place in my life (other than say as a client,and thats not my life lol).

I can only go by what u tell me...all this is new to me.
I guess we will never be a pair because, unlike your dude, I would never want my chick escorting. Sorry. I'm a do what I gotta do, mami lemme handle that, type of dude.
Yes, I tried to talk to you but perhaps you misunderstood me, I didn't know u were an escort until u put that out there. All I knew was u were a fly lil redbone that posed for btg and u were in dc visiting fam and friends for the weekend.
And damn I wish y'all would get it straight, I have no problem openly dating a fly ass ts, I do have reservations about dating an escort of any gender. Health and safety reasons.

[Handandsom]

You should approach someone by whether they have a dick or not. it should be i find u attractive. Later down the line you may end up with a gg woman who makes u happier then u thought u would have been with a tg woman.

And here is where I think I can chime in with my cents. No man is a 100% when dating, period. As a man who was once a boy, I've had all kinds of feelings about dating as i grew there was; who to date and who not to date, who to spend on and who not to spend on, who to introduce to my family and who not to introduce to my family, etc. And by the way this was just for the opposite gender. So can you understand the scope of this issue when you introduce the Trans-gender. Keyword being "TRANS"