ladies: if u knew a girl had a disease

An infectious disease like hiv, herpes, etc. And she was still escorting would you out her or try to convince her that what she's doing is wrong?

How far does the pink wall of silence extend?

Condoms aren't 100% effective, some times they break and some diseases like crabs can still be caught with the use of condoms.

Seems like whenever a girl dies young because of an std you'll here other girls comment on her death knowing that she was sick but still seeing clients but you never here them say that she was wrong for doing so.

I would never out someone who had a disease because it's not my place to do so, I would ask them to be safe and use protection,I know protection is not 100 percent safe but it decreases your chances of catching something. In escorting there are plenty of clients with dirty hands also,IE breaking condoms, offering to pay more for sex without condoms and some girls are naive or desperate enough to do so. I remember when I lived in Atlanta there were girls who had hiv and it was common knowledge ,but because they were pretty or would do anything or hung, guy's would still flock to them,So I just tell guy's and girl's to be careful and know that when your having sex with a perfect stranger take every precaution and know that whatever comes of it was your own choice.

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Originally Posted by raheme

An infectious disease like hiv, herpes, etc. And she was still escorting would you out her or try to convince her that what she's doing is wrong?

How far does the pink wall of silence extend?

Condoms aren't 100% effective, some times they break and some diseases like crabs can still be caught with the use of condoms.

Seems like whenever a girl dies young because of an std you'll here other girls comment on her death knowing that she was sick but still seeing clients but you never here them say that she was wrong for doing so.

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Most wouldn't tell dudes about their 'sisters' but they'd tell their 'sisters' about a dude...kind of a blue shield, code of silence type of thing

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Originally Posted by carmencream

I would never out someone who had a disease because it's not my place to do so, I would ask them to be safe and use protection,I know protection is not 100 percent safe but it decreases your chances of catching something. In escorting there are plenty of clients with dirty hands also,IE breaking condoms, offering to pay more for sex without condoms and some girls are naive or desperate enough to do so. I remember when I lived in Atlanta there were girls who had hiv and it was common knowledge ,but because they were pretty or would do anything or hung, guy's would still flock to them,So I just tell guy's and girl's to be careful and know that when your having sex with a perfect stranger take every precaution and know that whatever comes of it was your own choice.

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Well said!

I had a tranny call herself warning me about a friend of her's who had something.

But she only outed her because she was jealous and liked me. But the Tgirl in question was just cool and had already told me ages ago. So now she looked like an even bigger un-passable ass for going behind her girlfriends back. The same friend who gave her a home when she was on the damn street. And with her track record God only knew what she was carrying her damn self!

And here it is 3 years since my friend had passed away and that snitches crack headed ass is slowly smoking her life away.... So what was the damn point of her living and my friend who'd give her last while still dealing with her own problems, dying????

So R.I.P. to you my angel, I know you're in a better place but you're definitely missed right now <:(

Another one of the multi-facets of Indy. Sorry to hear about that. Losing someone is never easy.

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Originally Posted by carmencream

I would never out someone who had a disease because it's not my place to do so, I would ask them to be safe and use protection,I know protection is not 100 percent safe but it decreases your chances of catching something. In escorting there are plenty of clients with dirty hands also,IE breaking condoms, offering to pay more for sex without condoms and some girls are naive or desperate enough to do so. I remember when I lived in Atlanta there were girls who had hiv and it was common knowledge ,but because they were pretty or would do anything or hung, guy's would still flock to them,So I just tell guy's and girl's to be careful and know that when your having sex with a perfect stranger take every precaution and know that whatever comes of it was your own choice.

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I have to disagree with this. If you know someone has something like Herpes or HIV then you MUST tell anyone you KNOW about it that could be fucking with them. Decisions are based on the knowledge one has at any given moment. If you know someone is going to possibly run across an infected person, then I feel one is obligated to let people know. Furthermore, if a trick or hoe is having sex with people for money and NOT telling people they are infected, it should be a criminal offense.

I agree with the "be safe" advice, but overall, in my opinion that's not enough.

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

I have to disagree with this. If you know someone has something like Herpes or HIV then you MUST tell anyone you KNOW about it that could be fucking with them. Decisions are based on the knowledge one has at any given moment. If you know someone is going to possibly run across an infected person, then I feel one is obligated to let people know. Furthermore, if a trick or hoe is having sex with people for money and NOT telling people they are infected, it should be a criminal offense.

I agree with the "be safe" advice, but overall, in my opinion that's not enough.

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Like you said it's your opinion and I stated my own ,First off I'm not the CDC so like I said b4 I tell everyone to be safe and I feel that I have done my job , I don't disclose pp'ls status's because that is not for me to tell and it is a criminal offense for ppl to be sex-workers and have diseases. It's time for ppl to Take responsibility for their on actions and stop thinking others have their best interest in mind, esp if they are being paid .

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Originally Posted by carmencream

Like you said it's your opinion and I stated my own ,First off I'm not the CDC so like I said b4 I tell everyone to be safe and I feel that I have done my job , I don't disclose pp'ls status's because that is not for me to tell and it is a criminal offense for ppl to be sex-workers and have diseases. It's time for ppl to Take responsibility for their on actions and stop thinking others have their best interest in mind, esp if they are being paid .

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I agree with Ms. Carmen. As citizens, our only obligation is to encourage one another to be safe. Just as it's a criminal offense to knowingly have a disease and engage in sexual intercourse without telling your partner, it is also a criminal offense to disclose someone's health information to the public. It's called HIPPA (Health Information Privacy Protection Act) Laws. Check em out. Health records are NEVER public and you can definitely end up in jail for a long time for disclosing private health info. I know a few people that have HIV right now, but I would NEVER tell anyone who they are because I have no right to disclose their very private and personal information.

My advice.......Protect yaselves or abstain and you won't have to worry about contracting.

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Originally Posted by vidman

I agree with Ms. Carmen. As citizens, our only obligation is to encourage one another to be safe. Just as it's a criminal offense to knowingly have a disease and engage in sexual intercourse without telling your partner, it is also a criminal offense to disclose someone's health information to the public. It's called HIPPA (Health Information Privacy Protection Act) Laws. Check em out. Health records are NEVER public and you can definitely end up in jail for a long time for disclosing private health info. I know a few people that have HIV right now, but I would NEVER tell anyone who they are because I have no right to disclose their very private and personal information.

My advice.......Protect yaselves or abstain and you won't have to worry about contracting.

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Vidman, I appreciate many of your posts, but this one is a little incorrect. It's HIPAA first of all (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) and, without boring the board with all the legal specifics, it was meant to do 3 major things: 1) limit the restrictions insurance companies can place on coverage, 2) decrease the amount of people dropped from their insurance and 3) drastically increase the amount of medical information available electronically to increase efficiency and hopefully reduce costs. It didn't do a great job at any of the 3. However, because of the 3rd issue, Congress realized that there would be real concerns over the availability and security of people's private health records, so they instituted a variety of rules (primiarily in a provision called the HITECH Act) that dealt with information privacy as it relates to people who have direct access to medical records (i.e. nurses, doctors, pharmacists, etc.). If you don't have access to those medical records, then HIPAA doesn't make discussing someone's medical issues a crime and you won't end up in jail. If you are lying it could make it defamation or libel, but that's civil and not criminal and a whole other issue....

As to your point: "As citizens, our only obligation is to encourage one another to be safe", well that's not an obligation as a citizen. In fact, what I am suggesting is not an obligation as a "citizen". In our legal system, in most states, you have only the obligation to report a specific felonious act if you have knowledge of it before the act occurs. Because, it is in fact NOT a crime in most areas for an HIV or herpes infected person to have sex with another person and not tell them, then there isn't even a crime there nor would it be a crime if you knew they were going to slap uglies beforehand and didn't tell. Now, what I am saying is that a) we have the moral responsibility to inform someone we know if you know they will or might have sex with someone who is infected and b) it should be a specific criminal act for a person who knows they have an STD to have sex with someone else and not tell them. I am not saying we shouldn't have personal responsibility, but I am saying I look out for my brothers (and sisters) and what they do with the info I provide is their responsibility.

@Bigdicki I hear where you are coming from, but when I was younger I disclosed a girl in Atlanta's status to a friend . But because he wanted her so badly he ran back and told her she denied it , Said I was a hater and jealous of her :rolleyes:because she was prettier ,She threatened my life and I lost my friend, she is now dead and he is positive I see him hanging out downtown everytime I visit Atlanta.So the moral of the story is stay out of other ppl's affairs because at the end of the day ppl are going to do whatever they want to do and leave their morals at the door! seen it time and time again,Wake up ppl it's time for us to be Accountable for ourselves! I respect your opinion and this again is only mine and the way I handle the issue.

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Originally Posted by raheme

An infectious disease like hiv, herpes, etc. And she was still escorting would you out her or try to convince her that what she's doing is wrong?

How far does the pink wall of silence extend?

Condoms aren't 100% effective, some times they break and some diseases like crabs can still be caught with the use of condoms.

Seems like whenever a girl dies young because of an std you'll here other girls comment on her death knowing that she was sick but still seeing clients but you never here them say that she was wrong for doing so.

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Drop the "pink wall of silence" stuff cause it's not about any particular loyalty to anyone. I wouldn't tell anyone's status because it's none of my business to do so. People are so entrenched in this "reality tv show" mentality where everyone business is open for judgement and criticism, but I despise that shit.

If I know/suspect someone is positive I wouldn't mess with them and if you are a close friend of mine, I will say "be careful" or "don't do that" I'm not going to give "x,y,z" on the matter though. I always recommend people play safe many times on this forum, as I see guys talking about sucking dick and eating cum and all these dangerous activities. I fear HPV the most, and like was said with cervical cancer with women, men are largely getting oral cancer, warts, etc from HPV. With HPV, all you have to do is have unprotected oral sex, kiss someone, touch their genitals, with HPV and you can get it too. At the end of the day, it is the men, especially the P4P crowd that are putting themselves at risk with so many different partners. We all went to sex ed in school, this isn't 1940. If you want to run around and risk getting infected and bringing that shit back to your loved ones that is your prerogative and none of my business. So enjoy your life, do what makes you happy, but for every action there is a reaction and you chose to take that action and were not forced into it at all, so live up to what you've exposed yourself to.

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Now playing: Metallica - For Whom The Bell Tolls
via FoxyTunes

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Originally Posted by Ms Remy M

Drop the "pink wall of silence" stuff cause it's not about any particular loyalty to anyone. I wouldn't tell anyone's status because it's none of my business to do so. People are so entrenched in this "reality tv show" mentality where everyone business is open for judgement and criticism, but I despise that shit.

If I know/suspect someone is positive I wouldn't mess with them and if you are a close friend of mine, I will say "be careful" or "don't do that" I'm not going to give "x,y,z" on the matter though. I always recommend people play safe many times on this forum, as I see guys talking about sucking dick and eating cum and all these dangerous activities. I fear HPV the most, and like was said with cervical cancer with women, men are largely getting oral cancer, warts, etc from HPV. With HPV, all you have to do is have unprotected oral sex, kiss someone, touch their genitals, with HPV and you can get it too. At the end of the day, it is the men, especially the P4P crowd that are putting themselves at risk with so many different partners. We all went to sex ed in school, this isn't 1940. If you want to run around and risk getting infected and bringing that shit back to your loved ones that is your prerogative and none of my business. So enjoy your life, do what makes you happy, but for every action there is a reaction and you chose to take that action and were not forced into it at all, so live up to what you've exposed yourself to.

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Now playing: Metallica - For Whom The Bell Tolls
via FoxyTunes

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Agreed! That's all I was trying to say in my post when I said, "we are obligated......" The only thing I can do is tell someone to be careful. If one of my boys came to me and said that he met such & such last night and they were supposed to hook up tonight, the ONLY thing I will tell him is to protect himself. I would never say that such & such has xyz. Not my place. I would emphasize that he needs to protect himself. That's all I was saying.

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

I have to disagree with this. If you know someone has something like Herpes or HIV then you MUST tell anyone you KNOW about it that could be fucking with them. Decisions are based on the knowledge one has at any given moment. If you know someone is going to possibly run across an infected person, then I feel one is obligated to let people know. Furthermore, if a trick or hoe is having sex with people for money and NOT telling people they are infected, it should be a criminal offense.

I agree with the "be safe" advice, but overall, in my opinion that's not enough.

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I believe it is a criminal offense in most states for a knowigly infected person to have sex with an individual without disclosing it. However, prostitution is illegal in all but 1 state sowhere does morality really fit into this convo? That's actually one of the reasons opponents of prostitutuion use to speak ill of the trade.

These girls live by a code obviously, them vs everybody else so I can't really fault carmen for saying what she feels. I don't agree with it but I also don't have to live/walk in her shoes.

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Originally Posted by raheme

I believe it is a criminal offense in most states for a knowigly infected person to have sex with an individual without disclosing it. However, prostitution is illegal in all but 1 state sowhere does morality really fit into this convo? That's actually one of the reasons opponents of prostitutuion use to speak ill of the trade.

These girls live by a code obviously, them vs everybody else so I can't really fault carmen for saying what she feels. I don't agree with it but I also don't have to live/walk in her shoes.

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What is this code someone please tell me? And your right you don't have to agree with me ,you asked a question I answered. It's funny when ppl post on here then when they don't get the answer they wan't it's some kind of conspiracy lol.Next subject please! I can only live my own life no one else's.

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

Now, what I am saying is that a) we have the moral responsibility to inform someone we know if you know they will or might have sex with someone who is infected and b) it should be a specific criminal act for a person who knows they have an STD to have sex with someone else and not tell them.

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Totally in agreement. If someone that i know or who i am close to is about to engage in an act of copulation with an individual that i know to be infected with a life threatening STD how could i not warn them. If one's moral compass is correct it would pain her/his conscience to no ends.

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Originally Posted by twowaybro

Totally in agreement. If someone that i know or who i am close to is about to engage in an act of copulation with an individual that i know to be infected with a life threatening STD how could i not warn them. If one's moral compass is correct it would pain her/his conscience to no ends.

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That is not the question he asked! He never asked would you warn someone you knew or that you were close to. I believe the question was to the ladies and like someone said b4 don't bring morality into the discussion, there is no place for it on a porn forum where ppl brag about laying up and how much they paid a chick who has the biggest dick etc etc etc .

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Originally Posted by carmencream

@Bigdicki I hear where you are coming from, but when I was younger I disclosed a girl in Atlanta's status to a friend . But because he wanted her so badly he ran back and told her she denied it , Said I was a hater and jealous of her :rolleyes:because she was prettier ,She threatened my life and I lost my friend, she is now dead and he is positive I see him hanging out downtown everytime I visit Atlanta.So the moral of the story is stay out of other ppl's affairs because at the end of the day ppl are going to do whatever they want to do and leave their morals at the door! seen it time and time again,Wake up ppl it's time for us to be Accountable for ourselves! I respect your opinion and this again is only mine and the way I handle the issue.

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Much respect to your post and sorry you lost your friend. However, I believe you did the right thing. Doing the right thing doesn't always end in a good result (i.e. the white freedom fighters who were killed in Mississippi comes to mind) but it is still the right thing to do. I always thought you had a good heart; now I know why I like you (and Pinky) so much. :p

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Originally Posted by raheme

I believe it is a criminal offense in most states for a knowigly infected person to have sex with an individual without disclosing it. However, prostitution is illegal in all but 1 state sowhere does morality really fit into this convo? That's actually one of the reasons opponents of prostitutuion use to speak ill of the trade.

These girls live by a code obviously, them vs everybody else so I can't really fault carmen for saying what she feels. I don't agree with it but I also don't have to live/walk in her shoes.

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I didn't say RELIGIOUS MORALITY. Morality and religion are often in opposition. If it feels better for you to use the word ethics, then substitute that. The point is that one should always choose to do the right thing and to me and many others the right thing is to inform someone who may not know that they are risking their life or health to a greater degree than they planned.

I sure as hell hope someone would warn me about another person that I may want to talk to. I don't need a specific, as far as their health, but a "Stay Away" would be nice. That's all it would take for me to hit the road.

Sorry, but I feel morals do play a part in this whole topic. But as stated previously, this too is my opinion.

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Originally Posted by vidman

Agreed! That's all I was trying to say in my post when I said, "we are obligated......" The only thing I can do is tell someone to be careful. If one of my boys came to me and said that he met such & such last night and they were supposed to hook up tonight, the ONLY thing I will tell him is to protect himself. I would never say that such & such has xyz. Not my place. I would emphasize that he needs to protect himself. That's all I was saying.

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Condoms break with more than insignificant frequency. Given that fact, would you keep this from your friend if he then said, "any reason why you specifically said that to me on this occasion?"

By the way, it is a felony in Michigan for a knowing HIV individual to engage in a sex act with another individual without disclosing your infection before hand. MCL 333.5210 passed in 1988 and went into effect in 1989. There are other laws associated with this issue.

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

Condoms break with more than insignificant frequency. Given that fact, would you keep this from your friend if he then said, "any reason why you specifically said that to me on this occasion?"

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BD, this is a very touchy topic. I agree with you on some fronts as I agree with Carmen on some fronts as well. If put in that situation, I would let my friend know to be careful, but I wouldn't be specific. I would come out and just say, "dude! She has HIV!!!" I would just emphasize that he needs to protect himself.

As far as the situation about the breaking condoms, I think that's similar to driving a car and risking an accident. Should I tell my friend not to drive because he could possibly die from a car accident? The answer is no. A condom breaking is the same situation. Anytime we have sex, regardless of if it's protected or unprotected, we take chances. That would be quite odd if my friend had a car accident right after I told him not to drive because he might have an accident. If he came back and asked me if there was "any reason why you specifically said that to me on this occasion," I think I would shit my pants because he's probably thinking that I sabotaged his car or something. Purely coincidental:eek: lol

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Originally Posted by DYNACORD

By the way, it is a felony in Michigan for a knowing HIV individual to engage in a sex act with another individual without disclosing your infection before hand. MCL 333.5210 passed in 1988 and went into effect in 1989. There are other laws associated with this issue.

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Oh definitely D-cord. I remember a case about 10 years ago of a man that got convicted, in Michigan, of having sex with a female and infecting her while knowing that he was HIV positive and not disclosing. I think it was Michigan. More states are adopting that policy.

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Originally Posted by DYNACORD

By the way, it is a felony in Michigan for a knowing HIV individual to engage in a sex act with another individual without disclosing your infection before hand. MCL 333.5210 passed in 1988 and went into effect in 1989. There are other laws associated with this issue.

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Michigan's law is very explicit in making it a crime regardless of intent and I believe regardless of whether there is a condom involved as long as the info isn't disclosed. I agree with this 100%. However, most states require intent to transmit to be proven in order for it to be a crime and in some states the crime is only a misdemeanor.

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Originally Posted by vidman

BD, this is a very touchy topic. I agree with you on some fronts as I agree with Carmen on some fronts as well. If put in that situation, I would let my friend know to be careful, but I wouldn't be specific. I would come out and just say, "dude! She has HIV!!!" I would just emphasize that he needs to protect himself.

As far as the situation about the breaking condoms, I think that's similar to driving a car and risking an accident. Should I tell my friend not to drive because he could possibly die from a car accident? The answer is no. A condom breaking is the same situation. Anytime we have sex, regardless of if it's protected or unprotected, we take chances. That would be quite odd if my friend had a car accident right after I told him not to drive because he might have an accident. If he came back and asked me if there was "any reason why you specifically said that to me on this occasion," I think I would shit my pants because he's probably thinking that I sabotaged his car or something. Purely coincidental:eek: lol

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Your analogy isn't quite congruent to this situation. If a person has HIV or AIDS and one has sex with them, even with a condom, the likelihood that person will contract the disease and die earlier than they would otherwise, increases. So, to make your analogy truly analogous, let's say the friend was drunk and was going to drive. I would say and have said, "you should not drive because you are drunk."

The key here is 'choice'

The guy should, in theory, have a choice to decide if he wants to have sex with a provider he knows has an std (granted she discloses that info)

However, one would argue that the guy had that choice, and opted not to use it by conducting an illegal act of paying for a prostitute.

A bit of an ethical conundrum

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

Michigan's law is very explicit in making it a crime regardless of intent and I believe regardless of whether there is a condom involved as long as the info isn't disclosed. I agree with this 100%. However, most states require intent to transmit to be proven in order for it to be a crime and in some states the crime is only a misdemeanor.



Your analogy isn't quite congruent to this situation. If a person has HIV or AIDS and one has sex with them, even with a condom, the likelihood that person will contract the disease and die earlier than they would otherwise, increases. So, to make your analogy truly analogous, let's say the friend was drunk and was going to drive. I would say and have said, "you should not drive because you are drunk."

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I think my example is very analagous. I will go out on a limb and say that condoms break just about as often as there is a car accident. Not necessarily tit for tat but you know where I'm going. I think the point I'm trying to make is that life is full of risks and mishaps. We don't stop living in order to avoid those risks and mishaps. What we do is try to be careful. I'm speaking purely of what could be incidental......completely accidental if you will.

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Originally Posted by vidman

I think my example is very analagous. I will go out on a limb and say that condoms break just about as often as there is a car accident. Not necessarily tit for tat but you know where I'm going. I think the point I'm trying to make is that life is full of risks and mishaps. We don't stop living in order to avoid those risks and mishaps. What we do is try to be careful. I'm speaking purely of what could be incidental......completely accidental if you will.

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Then we respectfully agree to disagree. Just fyi, if I know of a broad (or dude) that could be risking your life or Carmencream's life or whoever even though you are only people I talk to on a board... I'm letting you know the info I have.

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

Then we respectfully agree to disagree. Just fyi, if I know of a broad (or dude) that could be risking your life or Carmencream's life or whoever even though you are only people I talk to on a board... I'm letting you know the info I have.

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LOL! Thanks BD. I appreciate the lookout. One last question, BD. Let's just suppose for the sake of supposing that the person that you warn me or Carmen about is your close close friend. What would you do then? Not trying to get the debate stirred again, just asking. Your answer just might sway the way I feel about this.

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Originally Posted by vidman

LOL! Thanks BD. I appreciate the lookout. One last question, BD. Let's just suppose for the sake of supposing that the person that you warn me or Carmen about is your close close friend. What would you do then? Not trying to get the debate stirred again, just asking. Your answer just might sway the way I feel about this.

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I'd say something like, "Listen, I know you are trying to get with "blah, blah" but I know for a FACT that you should not." If you asked for specifics, I'd say the person has something that you don't want and leave it that. Now, that's if it's a close friend who is in question who asked me to keep his/her "secret".

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

I'd say something like, "Listen, I know you are trying to get with "blah, blah" but I know for a FACT that you should not." If you asked for specifics, I'd say the person has something that you don't want and leave it that. Now, that's if it's a close friend who is in question who asked me to keep his/her "secret".

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Ok now, not saying that I would do this, but you know there are some people that would.......What if I went back and told the girl, "BD said that I shouldn't get with you because you have something that I don't want." How would you respond to that "close freind" if she came back and confronted you about the situation?

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Originally Posted by vidman

Ok now, not saying that I would do this, but you know there are some people that would.......What if I went back and told the girl, "BD said that I shouldn't get with you because you have something that I don't want." How would you respond to that "close freind" if she came back and confronted you about the situation?

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Ha! I'm glad I'm still sharp b/c I KNEW this would be a follow-up question. Here is the thing, I AM NOT CONCERNED WITH HOW OTHER PEOPLE VIEW ME WHEN I KNOW I AM RIGHT. Even if it's a close friend, I would say a) I didn't break my oath of "keeping the secret" and b) that they should not be fucking without telling people they have the germ. There are people out there who will still bang if you got shit, so there is no need to deceive people. Now, if it's some non-life threatening info, like say a girl in Chicago (and sometimes other Midwest cities) who uses fake and Photoshopped pics that make you believe she's a dimepiece as opposed to a 6'1" 265 pound behemoth.... well, I wouldn't tell that. :D

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Originally Posted by bigdicki

Ha! I'm glad I'm still sharp b/c I KNEW this would be a follow-up question. Here is the thing, I AM NOT CONCERNED WITH HOW OTHER PEOPLE VIEW ME WHEN I KNOW I AM RIGHT. Even if it's a close friend, I would say a) I didn't break my oath of "keeping the secret" and b) that they should not be fucking without telling people they have the germ. There are people out there who will still bang if you got shit, so there is no need to deceive people. Now, if it's some non-life threatening info, like say a girl in Chicago (and sometimes other Midwest cities) who uses fake and Photoshopped pics that make you believe she's a dimepiece as opposed to a 6'1" 265 pound behemoth.... well, I wouldn't tell that. :D

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LMAO!!! Now that's the shit you need to be telling!!! lol!!!!