Thanks for the props ‘South’ and MrF, I appreciate it. However, no sooner than I hit the submit button to send my last reply about 2:30am calls, guess what I get (You’ll win the “Fucking Duck” grand prize); another $MONEY$ call!!!
I thought to myself this is creepy! It’s as if the girl was standing over my shoulder, looking at every word I pecked out to reply to this thread!
I put her on hold so I could record this moment. I went into the next room to get my recording device (you can pick one up at your local surveillance [Spy] store). I hooked it up to my cell phone and this is the Déjà vu conversation I got:
Me: Sorry about that baby, who is this?
T-girl: Oh, you don’t remember who this is? I called you last week, but I told you I would call you back! You remember now, I was the pretty girl you spoke to in CVS and we talked outside. Remember you said I was pretty?
Me: Oh yeah, [The Pretty Girl] we spoke last Wednesday or Thursday?
T-girl: It was Wednesday and I called you, but I said I would call you [right] back because I had something to do at the moment.
Me: Fuck that was quite a while ago, did you get done what you had to do?
T-girl: You so silly! Whachew doin’?
Me: Nothin’ about to make a sandwich with a beer, why?
T-girl: What kinda sandwich? What kind of beer? Corona?
Me: My personal favorite; turkey breast, ham, Swiss cheese and mayo on deli rye. I’ll wash it down with a Red Stripe.
T-girl: Shit that sounds good! Do you want to share it with me?
Me: If I do, it’s going to cost you!
T-girl: Oh yeah, like what?
Me: Fifty dollars for the sandwich and seventy dollars for the beer!
T-girl: Why so much?
Me: Well I don’t have a license to dispense food or alcoholic beverages, so I might as well make a 1000% profit, feel me? You know like a blow job that used to cost twenty dollars, now it costs two hundred! Feel me?
T-girl: Yeah, but I don’t charge that much!
Me: So, you just called to see what I was doing and you want me to share my sandwich and Red Stripe for charity sake?
T-girl: Naw!
Me: Then what’s up? It took you almost a week to call me “right” back, so wassup? You just want to talk?
T-girl: Well, I wanted to go to Atlanta for the weekend and…
Me: So, you want to have a snack and beer with me, give me a free blow job, but help you get to “The Dirty South” based solely on a returned phone call?
T-girl: Naw, it ain’t like that; I just want to get to Atlanta!
Me: You mean you barely know me, yet you won’t break bread with me or suck my dick for chance to go to Atlanta?
T-girl: Fuck you, you’re getting the shit all mixed up! [Click! Dial tone.]
Another blue pill moment!
Kilakali, consider yourself very lucky!